When
Betsy realized she had been elected supreme leader she was
dumbfounded. She was, as were all the other cattle, a devoted
follower of Mahatma the Gandhi, and believed in a nonviolent,
vegetarian lifestyle. The cattle believed themselves sacred and loved
Gandhi for his mind and his writings. He had said: "I worship
the cow and I shall defend its worship against the whole world."
This binational enterprise that Saint Josh and Perky Pete were
conniving on had become at least trinational if you didn't include
all the other critters that roamed throughout Gilgimarsh, and she
had no intentions of battling with this conflict over regurgitation.
So Betsy, after a quite gathering with the herd, called a meeting
with Saint Josh and Perky Pete and using all the diplomacy she could
muster, delved into the concept of a leaderless society in which cows
would be sacred, toucans would regurgitate only where fertilizer was
needed and a few treats for the cows and could be gods if so
inclined, and humans would give up all ownership rights and be simply
treated as honoured guests of Gilgimarsh and make all the mozzarella
and lasagna they wanted.
Perky
Pete was tired of being god and all the insults he was getting and
thought it possible that an I – Thou relationship could be
reestablished amongst the the disenfranchised pantheon as well as
with regurgitation. But for Saint Josh it was not so simple. His
love of lasagna was all consuming and his faith in it's qualities and
that the pungency of ripe mozzarella had the ability to invoke the
divine in most humans was beyond questioning. He had been appointed
guardian of the tribe by his predecessor and had no faith whatsoever
in their ability to remain committed to the pungency and passion of
his great calling. In order to live up to the honour which future
writers would bestow on him and live up to the motto that "Whoso
keepes the fig-tree shall eat the fruit thereof" he decided to
forgo war at the present time and keep his cohorts faithful to their
calling in their new land by causing no waves. And thus the cows
became sacred and the gods resumed their pantheon and Justin the
Bieber had lasagna for his 4 a.m. munchies for the foreseeable
future.
Picked
up a small job for the next day or ten so will resume “The saga of
Gilgimarsh” when they tire of my good looks and sublime comments.
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