At
every level in our inventory, nothing seems special about our Earth,
our Sun, our Galaxy, our Local Group. Evidently, mediocrity reigns
throughout. Such is our niche in the Universe.
Eric Chaisson
Fellow Canadians, we
must pull together in this time of retrospect to achieve a workable
drollery in retaining our pensive mediocrity. We must also, at the
same time, cater austerely to the whims of all our diverse and
salient traditions. Without them all our mediocrity would vaporize
into a thin waft of tenaciousness. Even our drippy economy might
succumb to stagnation or even worse a humiliating amelioration.
As we Canadians dawdle
along into the 21st century we must remember with courage
our heroes of past eras such as Joe Clark and Kim Campbell who filled
us with substance and truth and gave us the will to chuckle amiably
at those with overtures of grandeur. Lest we find ourselves
succumbing to the tides of uncouth heroism in a ravaged and
unsustainable world, let us not forget these gurus who taught us well
the workings of commonplaceness.
The brain freeze of
winter ensures a great lacklustre so that we can achieve a sopor
fathomless enough to enjoy the
solitude of summer in our lakeside cottages. To canoe along the
waterways in peaceful bliss is the one and only reason why all our
divergent traditions have alighted on this unencumbered piece
of real estate on the northern fringes of habitable abandon. Even the
geese stay as long as old man winter holds his breath.
Wars will be wars, let
them be fought by peoples in climes unravaged by ice and snow. We
have enough to fill our minds with the fortitude needed to deal with
a dead car at 40 below and a driveway blown in with four feet of
snow. And if Putin wants to drill for oil where it's minus 80 with a
50 mph wind for 8 months every year in our disputed Arctic regions
let him. It's his whiskers. They better bring a good supply of
vodka.
Our nation has had it's
great and envisaging politicians, men and women who were elected by
the robust few who could get their car started on election morning,
or by those whose canoes were still frozen in the reeds come a spring
vote, or by those so bedazzled by the new greenery around them that
they felt sure the gods must be in favour of the incumbents and had
to pay homage. These politicians envisaged a Canada where people
actually accomplished something in winter and didn't just spend the
whole day warming up for the way home if they faithfully made it in.
They envisaged cities filled with residents who stayed home from the
lake in summer to carry out great business dealings which could bring
in some tax revenue. But alas, the cold froze our brains and
lacklustre ensured the ensuing mediocrity and come spring everyone
bolted for their cottages to join the geese on our nations abundant
waterways.
We
have a very few in our Canada who wish to destabilize our mediocrity
and bring forth concepts unthought of while bucking three foot drifts
on the way to the curling rink. They have not achieved the drollery
needed to sustain a lacklustre survival instinct which Canadian life
depends upon in their new or first generation environment. Give them
a decade of ice and snow and they will not even remember legends of
warmer climes where insights into the human condition were fought
over. We need to give them a canoe so their frozen brains can then
soper fathomlessly in summer unbesieged by the remnant of forlorn
city slickers. This is the only real Canadian solution and is
guaranteed to work miracles on anyone's delusions of grandeur and
it's as mediocre as it comes.
As
is unrelentingly always the case these wild insights will ne'er be
scrutinized as our brains freeze up for winter and we dream of
endless waterways where we can meander with the geese in total
oblivion. Our pensive mediocrity is safe no matter what we do.
No comments :
Post a Comment