Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Fun with allegories

Fun with allegories (just like fun with Dick and Jane)

Since we're all in the car careening along with our dear Prime Minister here, “There's a liberal Steve, eh, you nailed him real good!” we can discuss with him some of our favourite topics like AI (that's artificial intelligence in case you're parsimonious and don't read much science fiction), or how humans are evolving spider like mutations so we can survive the coming extinction event (we have spiderman to prove this), or the war on drugs, that continuing battle to cover up the history of the magic manna, that spiritual nutrient which flavoured our major religions.

We'll stick to facts here, or at least plausible conjectures, since Stevie isn't too keen on conspiracy stuff, “There's another one, Steve, biking in the traffic.” Now the good book says that woman created god in her own image, and we may get a few things dyslexically inverted here, and made her prone to peripheral dyslexia (that's the snake for the allegorically attenuated), an impairment to processes that convert letters on the page into abstract representations, more or less. So it was that she read the good book, being omnipotent and knowing what it was going to say, she created a literal rendering of those letters on the page and to our amazement she did it in six days flat. Wow. “Look out for that pothole, Steve, it's full of worthless dirty tar.”

Allegory can be much like politics, with differing layers of allusion, like the truth, a little truth, or no truth at all. Just like conspiracy theories. “That's an NDPer jay walking over there Stevie, leave him live, he'll split the vote for you.” But would the truth set us free? Truth seems to be also an allegory with “The truth shall set you free” speaking of a higher form of knowledge than is capable of being learned in parliament. So truth is really all allegory? No wonder she was created prone to dyslexia (that's the snake again), we've got to make sense of our world somehow. Those awesome vermin.

“There's a lonely conservative, Steve, better give him a lift to the polling booth quick before that snake over there gets him.”
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